do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
