Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
