also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
