shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
PANTIES FOUND
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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