So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
why do cheetos always look like penises
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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