I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
