So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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