Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
