i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize