Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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