Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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