If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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