She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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