I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
