Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
