Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
