Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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