i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
