ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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