We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Drake has all the answers
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
