Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
