Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
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