HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
