i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
