I'm eating all of the evidence.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
