yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
