just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
