You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
