Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I am available for nakedness
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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