You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
