hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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