Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
