Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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