do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
