There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
