i just google imaged poop.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
they're like a gay fantastic four
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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