There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
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