Umm I'm too high to move.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
