this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
