NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
