I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
