She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
