their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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