Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
