"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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