is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
