If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
This is my gift to your gina
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
