Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
