I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
