Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
